My experience of the last few years has proven otherwise. The government and the media have dehumanised us. I have heard slurs said in casual conversation on the street, had young boys say the “r-word” while maintaining eye contact and others have looked down in shame because they know what they are doing is wrong. Grown men have uttered it in pubs like it’s nothing.
Now, when I use social media, my eyes flicker down, hoping not to catch on one of those words, and I think to myself, “Back here again, huh?”
As Disabled people, we’re often told that our writing should end just so, with carefully chosen, pretty, polished, nice, words. But honestly, it’s enough to say: we’re going through it right now, again, and that sucks.
Rethinking Disability and Independence
Today, I’m going to answer a question I hear a lot: “But what if my loved one doesn’t want to be independent… or just can’t be independent?”
Maybe they’ve told you directly: “I don’t want to live on my own.” Or maybe they’re resisting every step you take toward helping them be more “independent.” Or you don’t believe they can be more independent.
You’re not alone—and you’re not doing anything wrong. In fact, this might be the perfect moment to rethink what independence means for your loved one with a disability. Instead of pushing toward independence, ask: “What does a good life look like for my loved one, with the support they need?”